Porn Queen Chasey Lain Has Fallen On Hard Times

I remember the once beautiful Chasey Laine's cameo in Spike Lee's "He Got Game", a terrific scene in which Chasey played "Buffy" and got to show off her underrated acting skills instead of just boning some dude on camera for money (because that's what hookers do, right?). Well, thatwas many moons ago, now judging from this YouTube clip, it seems that poor Chasey, has surprisingly (shoot she looks like she might be on drugs!), fallen on some hard times, but perhaps there's a lesson this somewhere for all the poor, young, white trash out there considering a "career" in porn.

Uncle Luke Gets Married

Guess 47 years was enough for Luke to finally sow his wild oats. Hey, at least he's honest with himself:

Known as a playboy to many, former 2 Live Crew member Luke Campbell has officially settled down with girlfriend of two years Kristin Thompson. The two were married on July 19 during a wedding ceremony at Luke Community Methodist Church in Dallas, Texas.

"I waited 47 years to find a special woman and have found that in Kristin," Luke told People Magazine. "I never knew that I could feel love on another level like this until I met her, and I am now honored to call her my wife."

Good luck to the happy couple, he'll always be a legend in my book regardless.

Rick Ross Used To Carry A Nightstick

As many times as I've read Rick Ross articles where he talked about all his supposed riches and vast drug empire, you just knew the cat had been reading too many "True II The Game" books. And now that sh-t has hit the fan.....

Did Miami rap impresario Rick Ross crib his best coke-dealing stories from inmates while working as a prison guard?

Perhaps.

The Smoking Gun has cleared up a minor controversy surrounding the hot-right-now rapper. Turns out, Ross was in fact a Florida corrections officer, despite his claim that pictures circulating online showing him in uniform were “fake.” Not that there is anything wrong with being a prison guard, mind you. Except when you explicitly deny as much, and especially when virtually all of your best-known songs (like Ross’ 2006 cocaine-dealing anthem “Hustlin’ ” and his recent hit with T-Pain, “The Boss”) hype the outlaw/drug kingpin lifestyle.

Ross released a statement last week denying that the photos were real, saying, in part, “My life is 100 percent real. These online hackers putting a picture of my face when I was a teenager in high school on other people’s body. If this was real don’t you think they would have more specifics, like dates and everything else?”

....I'm instantly reminded of O.C.'s classic "Time's Up": Speakin in tongues, about what you did/but you never done it/Admit you bit it cause the next man gained platinum behind it/I find it ironic, so I researched and analyzed/Most write about stuff they fantasized.....

"You Just A Bitch In A Robe"

Wow.

Al Reynolds: I Am Not A Homosexual

We don't believe you Al, you need more people.

50 Cent Granted More Time With Son

MTV.com:

50 Cent was in Long Island Family Court on Thursday (July 17) for a custody hearing, during which a judge granted his request for more time with his 11-year-old son, Marquise.

According to 50's lawyer, Brett Kimmel, the judge said 50 — who recently told MTV News that the lack of quality time with his son was impacting their relationship — can have unrestricted time with Marquise from August 3-12. Kimmel said he knew Marquise would be staying with 50 during that time but that he had no other information about what their plans were.

Both 50 and his estranged girlfriend, Shaniqua Tompkins, had to submit to drug tests at the courthouse before the judge would discuss custody issues with them at the request of the child's attorney, and both agreed to the rapid tests. Kimmel said 50's came back negative but that Tompkins' sample tested positive for opiates, which she explained by saying she was taking a medicine with codeine. Tompkins' lawyer had not returned calls for comment at press time.

As a businessman 50 is an egotistical bully whose many, many, many bad decisions have led to the fall of G-Unit. As a father I say he's been long victimized by money-hungry chick whose long exploited her son for financial gains. He deserves to spend more time with his kid.

390-Pound Mother Arrested For Sitting On Son

The Subway Goddess of Chile

Looks like she puts on a good show, but I wouldn't wanna be touching that pole after her vagina's done been rubbing all up and down it.

Kanye West Does Not Need Anger Management

Well it's from his mouth so it must be true, right?

One can only imagine how many sparks were flying off Kanye West's Mac Air after he returned from the holiday weekend and saw the story in Friday's Chicago Sun-Times, reporting that his management team was considering signing him up for anger-management classes in an attempt to curb the rapper's infamous temper tantrums.

Never one to let a good deed go unpunished, West vigorously denied the story on his blog on Monday. The headline said it all: "No Anger Management ... If Anything I Need Anger Enhancement! LOL!!!" In the rant, West made it clear that what you read is not necessarily always the truth.

"Do y'all remember when people said my fiancee was pregnant???? ... I'm just using that as an example of how people make up stuff and everybody runs with it," he wrote. "I had my own family asking me about that. Now the media is saying I'm going to anger management something or 'nother. I have never had any conversations about anger management. If anything, I need anger enhancement!! lol! I get off the plane in Hawaii today and the world is saying my management team said blah blah blah ... SIIIIIIGGGHHHH! I told the media you can't make up lies about me because I have a media outlet myself."

West's, ahem, angry response was inspired by comments from an unnamed "insider" in his camp, who reportedly told the Sun-Times gossip columnist that they thought anger-management classes would improve West's own "personal psychological well-being and relationship with friends," as well as help him get some lucrative endorsement deals.

Yunno, maybe it's time for Kanye to take break, like a really long vacation in Mongolia somewhere.

Cindy Brady Hungover, Throws Up During Radion Interview

She always did seem to be the black sheep in the family:

The actress who played smallest sister Cindy Brady on "The Brady Bunch" admitted to being hungover and said she felt like getting sick during a Denver radio interview on Thursday.

"Chris got me wasted last night and I am so ready to vomit on the microphone," Susan Olsen, 46, said of an acquaintance on the "Darren & Coba" show on JET 107.9.

In the middle of discussing her acting and her role on "The Brady Bunch," Olsen, who brought her 12-year-old son Michael to the interview, said she had been drinking heavily the previous night.

During the show, which was videotaped, the former child star kept clutching her stomach and swallowing as if she was going to throw up. At one point, the host asked her if she was all right. That's when she told him she was hungover and felt nauseous.

Click HERE to watch the video!

50 Cent Gets To Kiss 'All The Lovely White Girls'

Funny guy.

Eddie Murphy To Give Up Acting???

Makes sense to me, he's paid out of his ass and if you really peeped his resume you'd find that half of his movies really sucked. Besides getting back into stand-up, maybe Eddie should get into producing comedy shows or do like American Idol and do a reality show based on finding the next, great comedian.

It's taken him a while to come to his senses, but Eddie Murphy's brain has clunked into action and let him know that he only makes shit films now and should return to stand-up.

He said: "I have close to 50 movies and it's like, why am I in the movies? I've done that part now. I'll go back to the stage and do standup."

Hopefully "Beverly Hills Cop 4" will be Eddie's swan song from acting.